Pune, Punekar & Puneri!
P.I:
All the views below are in good humor and needn’t be taken seriously unless
you’re too adamant and a jackass!
2 years of crazy times.
Absolutely mental. That’s how I’ll remember Pune as. It taught me a lot. If
experience is supposed to be your greatest teacher. This was the mother of all
experiences.
Well, to start with Pune is so annoying at
times that even though you’re in a good mood it’ll set up situations such that
it’ll literally gate-crash into your mind and upset your perfect plan. In fact,
it was so frequent that even though when we used to plan going on a trip either
home or outstation (which was planned after considering every tiny bit of
nonsense that might get in the way) we were all the time in a dilemma is this
happening for real? Such is the aura of the place.
Not being negative, but
that’s how I learnt the first lesson that everything will not go according to
as you’ve planned all the times (hereby, most of the times) so you either need
to have a backup plan ready with whatever resources you have or enjoy your
sweet spot of solitude. It gets you more flexible and open to life as it keeps
throwing at you surprises that too which are size of cannons. You understand
and nurture the smaller, sillier, often under rated joys! Eating up the hail
off the ground when a storm hits is probably too bizarre, but is actually more
fun when you do it (Do try). Similarly, budgeting your weekly expenses and
finding out places which offer you chai on tapri instead of going for fancy
outlets like CCD and Starbucks. Parathas and Momos from the guy on your lane
sounds better than Delhi Darbar and Mainland China. Getting economical not only
helps you going light on your pockets, but it also helps you explore the place
more and learn a thing or two from your fellow co-foodie’s which you didn’t
know (it is either novel or bullshit, needn’t necessarily be true).
For people who are more of
introvert like me, well, life is more miserable with so many random strangers.
I wonder how people open up so soon and start talking all about their life to a
person you just met yesterday (except when you’re drunk). But then life gets
difficult the more you isolate yourself, so the only way out is embrace it,
slowly and steadily because ignorance is crap. It’s like you close your eyes
from reality, which doesn’t mean the weirdo can’t see you. It’s just that
you’re acting like a blind patient which gets scarier further when you open
your eyes because there is every possibility that the person might pounce on you.
Of course some people are crazy and Punekars are high on that list. But it’s in
their genes to be over-inquisitive and unreasonably adamant. That has been from
time immemorial. Hence, the much famed Puneri paati and Puneri behaviour
exists. High time they get it patented. It’s way too damn hilarious and stupid.
True... they are hell thrifty. Before anyone says whats wrong? It’s the Indian birth
right. Let me clear, this species is a bit more than an average Indian. Hence
the thriftiness is also more than you can speculate. Its different. Obviously,
since it considers itself different from everyone, every region, and every
system it has some of its unique characteristics. They stay in their own little
world on a planet called Pune. The way every Punekar boasts about Pune and
everything related to it is phenomenal. Past, present and also future of this
place everything is worth a voluminous description and exaggeration by a
localite to outsider. Even though Pune is dead polluted, so much that you
cannot identify a girl even when she comes close and says hi to you (Thanks to
the ninja sort of clothing around their face which reveals only eyes, again, if
not covered by glares) a Punekar will always have reasons to celebrate. They
say we’ve taught the world to develop a sense of fashion by that and also we’re
safeguarding our daughters and sisters from your devil eyes. Wow! You didn’t
see that coming. Did you?
The pohe, misal-pav, thali
pith make up the trademark Puneri snacks and the mastani which is a combination
of falooda with ice-cream. But dare you say it an ice-cream and you get dirty
looks from the outlet owner. They’ve literally put boards saying it’s not an ice-cream
and don’t call it so. Also, the guy behind the counter is always in a rush for
you to make a choice. He’ll keep yelling at you to order fast and if you take
time he’ll get annoyed and probably give u torn or soiled notes (always check
for your currency). The best experience of all this factors is felt at Chitale
bandhu which is almost a synonymous word to Pune’s eatery scenario.
Next thing would be a
debate. Remember never argue with a Punekar. You’ll lose hands down. Even if
it’s irrational, you’ll always be beaten brutally (verbally I mean). Views
might be offensive but you’ll be hugged the next day by words like “bhava, bas
kaay aata? Tu bolla te ek number’ch hota pan…” (Brother, c’mon. whatever you
said yesterday was fantastic but…). They
never quit. The ‘but’ always exits till you decide to let it go for the sake of
your own peace and also for the other person’s constant chattering jaws! Yeah,an
average Punekar says words/phrases like ek number, bhari, bhava, kadak, tuch to,
raada etc. around several hundred times in his conversation.
Even though people are a
bit absurd, they’ll touch your lives in a way of their own. They make you so
mad and amused all the times that they overpower the goodness in them. Whatever
and however they are, they make you miss them for all the pain in the ass
they’ve been. Certainly, they hold a pathetically weird place in your heart and
it’s funny that you can’t put it down in words.
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